The Cordell & Cordell Divorce Guide

Divorce Petition

To begin a divorce, one spouse must file a petition with the court, typically with the help of an attorney. These petitions often list more demands than expected, so it’s common for one spouse to request support or attorney’s fees upfront.

The other spouse (or respondent) must reply within a set time, admitting or denying the claims and requesting the court to deny the petition. Filing a cross-petition is a wise move in presenting their own position and avoiding a trial based solely on the petitioner’s demands.

Temporary Motions

Early in the divorce process, parties may file motions for temporary orders to resolve urgent issues, but most try to reach temporary agreements without the court’s involvement to lower attorney’s fees and create a favorable impression with the judge.

Discovery

Discovery is the process where both spouses gather information to support their cases for trial. It’s also crucial to anticipate and prepare thoroughly for your spouse’s claims to achieve a favorable judgment.

Settlement

Many divorce cases settle on or even during the day of trial, offering more control over the outcome and reducing the emotional stress associated with reliance on a judge’s decision.

Settlements can also save time and control rising attorney’s fees, which often increase as trial nears. However, unclear agreements may cause disputes later, leading to more litigation and higher costs.

The Pretrial Conference

Prior to trial, many states require a mandatory settlement or pretrial conference where both attorneys discuss the case with input from the judge. These meetings help both sides understand the emotional and financial costs of trial, often leading to more realistic negotiations.

The judge’s demeanor and feedback during these conferences can greatly impact the case. Some judges offer opinions on the facts and suggest settlements, while other states may require mediation or a status conference instead of a formal pretrial hearing.

The Trial

Most divorces don’t go to trial — but factors like income, length of marriage, and your spouse’s occupation can impact the chances of your case moving in that direction. When a trial occurs, its length depends on the court’s schedule and the complexity of the issues, lasting anywhere from a few hours to several weeks.

During the trial, the petitioner presents their case first, followed by the respondent.

The Aftermath

Divorce can be emotionally tough but staying calm and focused is key to protecting your interests and your children’s well-being. Concentrate on issues that impact your children, not just personal grievances.

Your attorney handles legal matters, but many decisions go beyond their role. Seek advice from others whose knowledge and judgment you respect. Always consult your attorney first, as well-meaning friends or family may unintentionally increase tensions.

Child custody refers to the rights and obligations between parents regarding their children after a divorce, legal separation, or paternity decree.

Physical Custody

Physical custody defines the length of time each parent spends with their child and can be sole or joint.

It’s often the most contested part of divorce, as it impacts parenting time and usually determines who receives child support.

Legal Custody

Legal custody gives a parent the right and responsibility to make decisions about a child’s health, education, and welfare. It can be sole or joint, with most cases allowing both parents legal custody even if one lacks physical custody.

Joint legal custody ensures the non-custodial parent stays involved in major decisions, preventing them from being excluded from important choices about the child’s well-being.

Custody Rights of an Unwed Parent

When a child is born during a marriage, the husband is presumed to be the father, but for children born out of wedlock, paternity must be legally established — either by signing the birth certificate or through a court petition. Without legal recognition of paternity, a parent cannot have custody rights.

If you are a parent and you are going through divorce, child support is certain to be an issue you will be facing. You will either be paying or receiving it.

Calculating Child Support

Most states calculate child support using formulas that consider:

• Parents’ income
• Time spent with the children
• The number of children

These formulas promote consistency and limit subjective decisions.

Common methods include:

• The Income Shares Model
• The Percentage of Income Model

However, in some states, not all, parents can set child support amounts by mutual agreement without using a formula.

What If You Can’t Afford Child Support?

Financial hardship does not automatically allow you to reduce child support payments. If you begin to fall behind, it’s important to consult a family law attorney promptly, as unpaid amounts can quickly accumulate.

You may be able to modify your child support if the circumstances used to set the original amount have changed or if other relevant factors are no longer valid.

Terminating Child Support

Child support doesn’t necessarily end automatically. Some states require filing a court motion to formally terminate the obligation.

It’s important to research your state’s specific rules to ensure you follow the correct procedure for ending child support.

It is not unusual for ex-spouses to want to change a prior decree respecting issues of custody and support due to a change in circumstances. Those circumstances may include dramatic changes in income, relocation to another state, or problems relating to the proper care of minor children.

Change of Circumstances and Modification

Custody terms are legally binding but can be changed through a court-ordered “modification.” Most states require proof of a substantial change in circumstances since the original order.

Courts closely review requests filed within six months of divorce and are unlikely to revisit custody without clear, significant new developments.

Preparing for Modification

After a reasonable amount of time, most custody and financial issues can be modified if circumstances change. Courts rely on this flexibility, and your behavior during the waiting period plays a key role.

Staying involved, paying support on time, and honoring parenting time strengthen your case. Missed payments or skipped visits can seriously hurt your chances.

Justifying Modification

Model behavior will greatly strengthen your case for modification.

Always try to amicably resolve issues in writing to create a clear record. If that fails, and there are no urgent health or safety concerns — ensure you’ve documented repeated violations before filing for modification.

Contempt of court is the willful failure to follow a legal order and can be used to gain leverage in settlement if the other party is noncompliant.

However, it can also be used against you if there is evidence of violations. It is important to continue diligently following all orders from the Court, even while a modification or other proceeding is pending.

Contempt Proceedings

Contempt applies only after the court issues orders, which can happen at any point during the divorce.

Once orders are in place, follow them carefully and document any violations by your ex, as judges take noncompliance seriously.

Consequences of Contempt

Presenting clear evidence of contempt can greatly strengthen your case. Your attorney may file a contempt motion alongside a motion to modify custody or support.

Contempt can be civil or criminal, also direct or indirect, depending on the violation. Each type carries different penalties and rules, and it is important to understand the differences.

Conditions of Contempt

A contempt action can be brought for any willful violation of a court order, but the violation should be significant to justify court involvement.

The court must find that the accused had the ability to comply and chose not to. It’s then up to the accused to prove they couldn’t comply or made an honest mistake.

Cordell & Cordell sets itself apart from other family law firms by offering our clients a simple 24/7 method to remain in contact with us. We keep clients aware of the process of their case and billing status, offer many of the best divorce resources available, and provide the best client care possible pursuant to our customer service pledge. Our glossary of common divorce terms explains the language you will encounter along the way.