joint custody Archives | Cordell & Cordell

Scott Trout Advocates For Shared Parenting In Indiana Lawyer

shared parenting

 

Cordell & Cordell Executive/Managing Partner, CEO Scott Trout was recently quoted in an article published by Indiana Lawyer detailing the efforts by Indiana lawmakers to pass legislation that would establish the presumption of shared parenting in the state. [Read more…]

Kelly Burris Explains Texas 50/50 Custody Bill

WOAI_LogoA bill making its way through the Texas state legislature would give parents equal custody of their children following a divorce.

Cordell & Cordell Regional Partner Kelly Burris recently appeared on WOAI San Antonio to explain the significance of the “50/50 custody bill.” [Read more…]

Joe Cordell Discusses Parental Alienation in The Huffington Post

huffington postParental alienation, or the action of one parent to manipulate a child away from the other parent, is a subject more widely recognized today than even just a few years ago.

In a new column for The Huffington Post titled “Is Your Ex Turning Your Child Against You?” Cordell & Cordell Principal Partner and Founder Joe Cordell discussed parental alienation and its impact on many fathers.

In the article, Mr. Cordell mentioned his 25 years of experience in representing men and seeing many situations in which one parent will let personal feelings damage the relationship between a child and the other parent.

“This can be done subtly and unintentionally through occasional belittling comments, to active and malicious ‘brainwashing’ with the intent to replace any love the child may have for the other parent with hate,” wrote Mr. Cordell. “Alienation can be cataclysmic during such an emotional time as divorce.”

Mr. Cordell also pointed out that, in the majority of situations, the primary custodial parent tends to be the person who contributes to parental alienation if it exists. Because many fathers are non-custodial parents, they often become the victim of such alienation.

He made sure to note that those parents who feel that they or their children are suffering from parental alienation should certainly complete every parental obligation that exists and seek the help of a psychologist familiar with the condition.

Read more from Mr. Cordell’s Huffington Post column.

Coping strategies for sharing custody of children

Parenting is difficult enough when both individuals are married and present to raise their child. This makes creating a peaceful environment for kids after a divorce even harder, as tension between the former couple can end up hurting the development of the child.

According to the Chicago Tribune, Judy Corcoran, co-author of a book titled “Joint Custody with a Jerk” noted that sustaining a peaceful environment for children is essential, despite how difficult it might be for both parents.

“You actually hate the person’s guts by this time,” Corcoran told the newspaper. “So that’s what we teach, how to communicate with this person.”

Though Judy Corcoran is a divorcee and a single parent, she noted that this “jerk” can be both a female or male, as both sexes can be responsible for creating this negative environment for a child.

Corcoran met the co-author Julia A. Ross at Parenting Horizons, an organization that helps divorced adults reconcile to the point where they can still be effective parents and have a positive impact on their child, according to the organization’s website.

 

When children want to choose one home or the other

Parents often think they know what’s best for their children, even if they have gone through a divorce. However, as children get older, they may want a say in the child custody arrangements, particularly when it comes to where they live, as these decisions can greatly affect their schooling and social lives.

Huffington Post contributor Diana Carbajal Mejia has experienced this first hand when her teenage step-daughter asked to live with her and the teen’s father full-time after sharing custody half-and-half with the child’s mother for eight years.

The teenager proposed the arrangement because the split time at two homes was making it difficult to keep track of her studies. She also had to constantly lug her heavy school books from one house to the other, and had to have two sets of school uniforms for each house.

After hearing this request, Mejia said she spoke with her husband about the situation. Next, it was important for the couple to discuss the daughter’s wish with her mother. All adults involved discussed what would be best for the teen and agreed that they could not refuse her request.

According to the Post Gazette, it is important that parents listen to these requests but avoid getting bullied into the decision. The reasons for living arrangement changes should be in line with the co-parenting plan.